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By Adam S. Wilikofsky, Ph.D.
Family and Community Medicine at Lancaster General Hospital
Walter L. Aument Family Health Center
The holiday season is an invigorating, joyous time of year when good will reigns supreme and cares melt away. Right? Well, not entirely. Anyone who has had to contend with overcrowded malls, shopping on a tight budget, or hosting a large family gathering can attest to the stress that occurs during this special part of the year. Such feelings are often all the more difficult to handle due to the unrealistic notion that it is your holiday duty to remain happy and cheerful on a full time basis.
Most people associate stress with negative, unpleasant events. Yet, there is ample research that demonstrates stress can also be caused by positive events. Marriage, the birth of a child, or starting a new job are all typically thought of as "good things." Despite this, they certainly can produce frazzled nerves, sleepless nights, short tempers, and the like for many. And so it is with the holiday season.
The recognition that feeling stressed is normal and permissible is an initial step towards decreasing the impact this has on day to day events. Some other tips that may help you deal effectively with holiday pressures are listed below.
- PLAN AHEAD. Try and make lists of what needs to be done some weeks in advance and establish target dates by which you expect to complete each one. Be reasonable with yourself and then try to stick to your schedule.
- SET "WORKING HOURS" FOR YOUR HOLIDAY RESPONSIBILITIES. Try and make sure to leave time to spend with family and friends, time that you won't spend worrying about all you still have to do.
- REWARD YOURSELF FOR A JOB WELL DONE. As you complete tasks on your list, do something for yourself. Take time out for an activity that you enjoy. This isn't being selfish, it's a way of taking care of yourself.
- GO WITH THE FLOW. Don't expect that everything has to go perfectly. This, after all, is the time of year during which people are open and understanding. Extend the same good will and tolerance to yourself. Avoiding impossible expectations helps reduce feelings of having done an inadequate job as well as a subsequent sense of post holiday letdown.
Thus far, the focus of this column has been on normal level holiday hassles and stresses. It is important to note that some individuals experience more profound symptoms of depression and anxiety at this time of year. These problems can be triggered by particular events in the person's life (possibly, but not necessarily, associated with seasonal events), can be part of an ongoing illness, or, in some cases, can be a biochemical response to seasonal changes. This last factor is characteristic of a condition known as Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). SAD should not be confused with the "holiday blahs." It is a significant mood disturbance that occurs regularly at a particular time of year and is not just the result of seasonal related stresses. If your symptoms become so severe as to interfere with your daily habits and routine, you may be experiencing more than simple holiday stress. In this situation consultation with your family physician is strongly recommended.
Dr. Wilikofsky is Associate Director, Family and Community Medicine at Lancaster General Hospital and a Consulting Psychologist at the Walter L. Aument Family Health Center.
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